Hindsight: A Letter to me at 14

The challenge was on Oprah a few years back. I took that challenge and decided to post it here. So, are you up for giving your younger self advice? What advice would you give to your “younger” self in a letter?

Dear Cathy:
I know you don't like to listen to grown ups and what they have to offer, but I can only hope as I am you as a grown up, that you will listen to me. You're 14 right now and you have your whole world ahead of you. I know what life is going to be like when you're 38, and honey there are just some things you need to not do!

Keep God first. You're active in youth at Church right now. Don't lose it. You keep God first right now, and most of the things we're going to go through later on wouldn't have happened.

QUIT SMOKING. Ugh, you don't really smoke much right now and it won't be so hard. In a few more years, you'll be glad you did. Believe me when I tell you that it's really hard to quit when you've been doing it for so long. (I finally quit around June 8, 2007 and it's been rough!)

Keep on saying no to drugs. You know it's the one thing I said actually said no to and I'm so glad I did. We'll drink some and sometimes to extremes, but drinking is never a problem for us.
When you start losing weight this year, work on keeping it off. Keep on exercising and make it part of your everyday life.

That guy at Aladdin's Castle that you think is wonderful. He's going to be your first husband. I'm not sure if you should go down that path or not. As long as you'll wind up where I am right now, you shouldn't. But, I don't think it works that way. I'm sorry to say that when you're walking down the aisle, 3 days before your 19th birthday, you're going to regret it and wish you weren't. We don't stay married toooooooo long. Hey, on the bright side, we went to school and learned how to type. This will be important. Maybe you should take typing in high school and not worry about failing or passing the class. Just do it!

In your junior year of high school, there will be a Christmas party for the Color Guard at the teacher's house. GO TO THE PARTY. Do not, and I stress, DO NOT go with Mireille to see that guy. That guy is a jerk. Because of the events of that night, you will battle with many demons for many years. Eventually, you will ask God to forgive you, and He will (see, keep God first and this wouldn't even be part of the hindsight), but it's a long and hard battle that you aren't going to share with many folks. You'll regret the events of that night forever. (Luckily, later on, you'll forgive yourself and God gave you a huge cup of Grace for that night too and forgave you.)

You're going to become guys' best friend. They will come to you to talk about their girlfriends. Just deal with it. It's not that you aren't good enough for any of them. It's that you're a good listener and you seem to know what to say. This won't really change through the years. Many times, you'll have more male friends than female friends.

When you and Tim break up, you're going to meet a guy named David. Now, listen very carefully, the two of you will get married. It's not a bad marriage, although ya'll don't communicate well. But, you will get divorced. The divorce will be painful. You will do everything you can to make it work but it's just not going to happen. But, here is why you have to marry this guy. You have two beautiful daughters who are your heart and soul. Oh, I just can't tell you how wonderful these girls are. They are so talented in many ways and they just bring joy to you. Oh yeah, sometimes you're going to feel like you're at your wits' end, but then one of them will do something so incredibly sweet, and it will melt you all over.

During this marriage, you will discover the Internet and chat rooms. Listen to me right now...any man you meet who knows you're married and still tries to sweet talk you isn't worth the time it takes to type hello. (If you keep God in that number 1 position, this will be moot.) If you would talk to your husband about these needs you have, you wouldn't have talked to this guy in the first place. That makes us examine the next point.

Learn to communicate your needs and emotions. Be able to tell people no and not feel like they are taking advantage of you, because you know what? THEY ARE! But, dear sweet young Cathy, you are allowing them to do so. Close that open wall up and build a beautiful door which only you can open. Oh you can be such a sucker...don't be a sucker Cathy.

You deserve better than having an affair. You are better than that. I know at 14 you think I'm insane even bringing this up, but trust me, it will become an issue. You deserve someone who will love you no matter where you are. You deserve someone who will hold your hand, call you and not hide the conversation, who will tell folks "Can I call you back? Cathy's on the phone." Cathy you are a wonderful person. All the good things you think you deserve? You do deserve them. (Hey look, again, if you keep God in that #1 position, this won't happen either.)

Sex. I've brought this up a lot, huh? You know what, it's not what's missing from your life. It's not what is going to make you happy. That hole you keep trying to fill is a God shaped hole and only He can fill it.

You know that little voice that you hear but then ignore? Learn to just listen to it. I can't tell you how many times that little voice is right. You're going to ignore her and be sorry. And you're going to hear her taunting you saying, "I TOLD YOU SO!!!!!!!"

Here's one thing I don't know if I should tell you or not. Your brother...you aren't going to believe this one....next year when he graduates from High School, the two of you are going to become best friends. I know it's shocking!!! He's still going to act like he's going to hit you and then really do it. For some reason, that never changes. Cherish him. Figure out how to save some of those long and crazy voice mail messages he leaves, because he won't be around to leave them when you're older. Oh Cathy you're going to miss him so much. Your whole world will change on March 28, 2002.

It's going to be hard and at first you just won't believe you're going to make it. Just keep on taking it one day at a time. Actually at first, it's one breath at a time. You'll make it through. You have to because shortly after this your mom is going to get really sick. She has to have you be strong for her. You make it through that too. See, you're amazing really at all you can do. You don't think you are sometimes, but you are.

At some point in 2004, when you least expect it, you're going to fall in love with this man named James. DON'T RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!! You'll spend months trying to run from him because of all your past mistakes. But don't do it. He's not going to let you get away. And YOU DESERVE HIM!!! This man is everything you have ever wanted in a husband and soul mate. Neither of you think anything will ever come out of your relationship because you're just friends, but it will. I can't tell you how much you are going to love him. I can't even find the right words to express myself in today's world about him. How can I tell you?? I asked him one day how he put up with me and all my quirks (we have quite a few) and he said he didn't put up with me. He just loved me.

Cathy, he's wonderful. He makes the other two marriages and all the heartbreaks in between worth it because he is the one you will go on with for the rest of your life.

You're going to have a bumpy road, Cathy, but if you'll keep this advice with you, you will be ok. All those little bumps and valleys and peaks make you who you are today. Keep seeing the beauty in everything and in everyone. Keep your wonderful sense of humor. Life is pretty funny, even when we don't think it is. You have a way of making people smile when they didn't think they could. You deserve all the good that happens in your life.

Above all, dear Cathy, keep God #1 in your life. I promise if you do this, many of the things I have told you about won't even be an issue. Even if you falter and slide away, He is going to open His arms for you to come running back into. Yippee!! He forgives you so much easier than you will forgive yourself. Good thing is that He is there to help you on your journeys.
Life is beautiful, Cathy, experience it!

I love you, don't ever ever forget that!!

“The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

Are You Prepared?

This time of year causes folks to reflect on what they would like to see happen in the new year or to make resolutions. I found out many years ago that I can't seem to keep any New Year resolution I make, no matter how simple it is. When I fail, I feel guilty and all sorts of other emotions that I have no business feeling. So, I decided many years ago that I would not make anymore New Year Resolutions!

However, this year, I found this post about being prepared for the new year. I wanted to share it and then make it my own. Below is my personalized preparedness...but please go to the original post and read it in its entirety. I believe you'll be blessed by it.

For 2009, these are the areas I intend to focus on:

Me. What adjustments do I need to make in my life in the areas of ministry, Bible study, service, prayer and obedience to what God is calling me to do? As a small group leader, I strive to be the example God would have me be for Him. I want to have His word hidden in my heart.

My husband. Besides my prayers for his salvation, I ask God specifically for ways I can and should be praying for my husband throughout the new year. I pray for God to show me how to be more loving towards him today than I was yesterday. I also pray to be the wife God honoring wife I am designed to be.

My children. My constant prayer is for their protection and a deepening faith, but I also want to be sensitive to what God is doing in their lives. Along with my own concerns, I ask God to show what areas I need to cover in prayer for the upcoming year. How can I be a God honoring mom to them?

Extended family. Who in your family needs special prayers for the coming year? This is a good time to make a list (not too long or you’ll be overwhelmed) of those who don’t believe, are struggling in their lives, or are ill.

Friends. How can I be praying and uplifting the special people in my life? Praying for them keeps me closer to them as well.

Missionary. Do you have a cause or missionary you support? Put it down and make a commitment to pray for them. (Include my pastor here too!)

World. Is there an area God is calling you to pray for on a larger scope? I’m committed to praying for President Elect Obama. (side note: 1/20/09 is the day set aside to cover our President in prayer.)

Finally, write it all down. (#8 & #9 haven't been changed from the original writer's words.) Assign a day of the week to each area (Monday for my immediate family, Tuesdays for extended family, etc.) Give each day a page and list who and what you’re praying for. Then leave space to write in updates during the year. This will help you reassess the following year as well.

Also jot down any promises God gives you in these areas so that you can go back and read them when you find yourself discouraged or off track. You’ll be amazed how much strength you can draw from these reminders that God is personally involved in every aspect of our lives.

I want to give Dineen a big shout out for sharing how she will start the new year. It was exactly what I needed to help me jump start my year!

Share with me your goals and/or dreams and/or commitments for the new year!

“The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

Wow...

I was just looking over my previous posts and except for the precious post about my new grandson (29 is really too young to be a grandmother - work with me here), I have only been a copy/paste blogger of late. Well, I did post the snazzy picture of my husband in his uniform all decked out.

I have so much going on, and yet not much going on. You know what I mean? (A lot of busyness...)

(I love the picture of Santa praying to baby Jesus. I have a beautiful figurine and ornament like this. I think I even have a bell!)

Let me just say that I have done not ONE BIT of Christmas shopping. Do you see that - NO CHRISTMAS shopping has been done at my house! You probably wonder why - well financial is one reason and my girls don't know what they want!!!!!! James said he doesn't want anything (that's what he always says) and I don't know what my mom wants. (We don't buy for extended family anymore. Both of my grandmothers are in their mid-80's and are constantly giving stuff away. Why do they want MORE stuff??) We buy for James' youngest son and his mom (the ex-wife, not James' mom - she died when he was 6). Actually we go to her house for Christmas Eve. She has a big shindig (I typed "sindig" at first - I hope that's not a sign of things to come lol.)

I didn't participate in BooMama's tour of homes because our tree isn't up! The girls were going to decorate it this year (after calling me Scrooge) and yet the half assembled tree has sat since Thanksgiving. Who are the lazy ones now??

I was so happy I got my Secret Santa and my Siesta Fiesta stuff out yesterday. I know I'm late, but I always am...Sorry ladies! Mary, I mailed you a book too! I opted not to send Christmas cards this year. If you're on my facebook friends' list, then I sent you some holiday flair!!

Well, I guess that's all I have for now. I hope all is well with you. Thank you for stopping by!

“The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

Introducing...

...my grandson, Anferny Ian! He was brought into this world on December 8, 2008.

Look at that pure sweetness - can you stand it?

One problem with Anferny is that he lives in Germany with his mommy and daddy! His daddy is my husband's oldest son and he is German! So, I've never met the mommy or the daddy and now I have a precious grandson who I probably won't get to meet anytime soon. But, that doesn't keep me from loving all of them! (Notice the overuse of ! I'm excited!)

Look at all that hair! And I don't know what he's wearing, but it sure is cute!!

So there's my little German angel. Feel free to coo and talk in a funny little voice while looking at the picture. I sure have!

“The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

The Patron Saint of Barbara...?

Last night, my husband (without me because, well, he's in KY and I'm in AL, and it's Christmas so funds are a little tight) went to some ball they had. He was awarded the St. Barbara award. What a strange award to receive, but he seemed pleased that he got it and he enjoyed himself at the ball. I was glad because he was really not looking forward to any of it. So, in honor of him getting the St. Barbara award, I'm going to post a picture of him all dressed in his military dress blues. (I think that's what they are called - I'm not a very good military wife, huh?)

Dapper, no? I asked (begged) him send me a picture, so I could see him in his uniform. I have seen him in it before when we went to Jr. ROTC ball right before we got married, but you know, I wanted to see him again!

Anyway, I thought I'd share the picture and something of a story with you too. Plus, now, no matter where I am, I can come to my blog and see a picture of my hubby.

(P.S. - "Things" are going much better right now, and I can only attribute that to God's masterful hands in our marriage. We still have to work on "things" but at least he wants to stay married!! Praise God!)

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Thank you Mama Siesta!

Over at AllAccess, they have a blog where you can leave a message for Beth, Travis, the praise team, Living Proof and the Lifeway team and thank them for the ten years of ministry amd how your life has been changed or just to say thankies!

Not wanting to lose what I wrote, I'm posting my message to them here. I encourage you to go over and leave them a message, if you feel so lead.

Like everyone else, I wonder where to begin. Without starting from the beginning, I can only imagine how Mama Siesta is going to feel when she reads all this about her. Truly a humble servant before our Lord, that one is. Sophie, I thank you for opening up the blog this way and allowing us a place to thank Mama Beth and let her know how much she’s meant to each of us.
Several years ago, when I was going through a horrible season in my life, my attendance at church was pretty spotty - at best. I had lost my brother, wasn’t sure if my mom was going to live and was going through an excruciating divorce too. I did get away on a Women’s Retreat and met a few ladies from our church. One of them was doing a Beth Moore study and everyone kept talking about how great Beth Moore was. So, to be quite honest, and I’ve never told anyone this, I thought the lady leading the class was Beth Moore. See, small groups and bible study outside of Sunday School were very novel to me. (This lady who I thought was Beth Moore has been my mentor the last couple of years and she has no idea I had the misperception!) Well, I went to the first class of her study, but no more. As a matter of fact, I didn’t really even go back to church for over 3 years!

In August 2006, I totally surrendered my life to Christ and just in time for the starting of new small groups! My friend (and mentor, whose name is Laura, not Beth) was leading a Beth Moore study, and well, Laura was about the only person I knew from church, so it was a given I would do her class. I really had no idea what I was in for, and it’s probably a good thing I didn’t, because I don’t think I’d ever have done the study! But, in August of 2006, I met one of the most of godly women I’ve ever met when I started Believing God. I finally met Beth Moore and thought she was the most precious woman ever (still do!). I got to hear stories about her love for God, her family, her heartaches, her Redeemer and how to believe God.

There are so many beautiful traits Beth has that I find so endearing. What stands out the most is how God turned her ashes into a picture of beauty and how He gave her such a gift to teach all of us women how to love Him wholeheartedly. She could very easily be put way up high on a pedastal, but she tells you NOT to do that. I admire her so much and I think the world of her, but I pray that I give her the credit she deserves and glorify the One who gave it to her!
In the last 2 1/2 years, I have gone from being so lost to being a small group leader! I’ve had an awesome and dear friend and mentor (Laura), and a wonderful godly teacher, Beth Moore, to help me grow in my relationship with Christ!

Mama Beth (and her precious family), I love you so much (and I told you that at the Siesta Fiesta, even if you just knew my name b/c I had on a name tag, I’m believing that you & Amanda really knew my name, whether I had on a name tag or not!), and I thank you for listening to our Father and for using the painful childhood you’ve had to turn it into a true living proof ministry. Words really are inadequate to express to you what your teaching has meant to me and how life changing the lessons have been. Thank you for sharing your journey with me and teaching me all along the way. I didn’t ever realize such a godly woman could still be so stinking silly and FUN!!! Thank you for showing me how to a godly woman and still love life in a fun and loving sort of way.

To the Moore family, the peeps at Living Proof Ministries and Lifeway, I can’t even begin to imagine how much work each of you invest into this ministry. I thank you for all your support and prayers and sacrifices that you’ve poured into the ministry to help touch so many lives. And to the Moore family, thank you so much for sharing your Mama with us and Amanda, thank you for the blog!!!!

Travis - I’m a new appreciator (is that a word? sure it is) of your music and I just love you and the praise team! Your music has really touched my soul!

I think I’ve written a novel, but I do want to make sure Mama Beth knows how much I just love her! She’s the one who helped teach me about Agape love so it’s only fittin’ I give her some!
I love me some Mama Beth!! Thank you so much for your ministry

(P.S. Did y'all know that Pink's real name is Alecia Beth Moore?)

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Pictures from Siesta Fiesta

Here are some pictures from the Siesta Fiesta from August. I can't remember now what's prompted me to post them - probably a thought that I never showed anyone (and that could be b/c I am not happy with the 50+ lbs the camera always seems to add to me). Anyyyywayyyyy...

Outside the Alamodome

Our reserved seating signs!!

My view!

Our group's picture from the Siesta Fiesta Q&A. There were over 1,000 Siestas there!

Aren't they darling?

This is from the Siesta Fiesta/Q&A Time. You can see my little face in the corner. That's JennyHope from Pelham talking to Melissa about hair! (I didn't realize I was surrounded by people I lived really close to!)

So, there you have it. I wish I hadn't forgotten my camera, but, alas, I did. Thankfully, Rich from Lifeway took great pictures and we got to snag them!

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Tagged!

I've been tagged by TCKK so I'm gonna give this a whirl. (But, I don't think I have 7 peeps I can tag to carry this forward.)

Seven weird or random things about me (wow, I'm glad it's only 7):

1. Last time I did one of these, I had a hard time coming up with 10 but as I read other people's lists, I kept saying "oh yeah, I do that too". I guess I'm a little more random or weird than I think (or like to admit).

2. My whole house can be turned topsy turvy but my silveware drawer will be in immaculate condition. Everything must be facing the same way and be in there neatly.

3. After a shower, I have to close the shower curtain. It'll bug me if I leave it open. (This goes for the shower curtain in my girls' bathroom...if I go in there, I have to close it. If I come to your house and it's open, I'll close it. Just doing my part to help out - you know?)

4. I change into my jammies as soon as I get home, and then I won't leave. If I have something to do after work, I try to just stay out till it's time to show up.

5. As confident as I might seem in a small group of folks, I'm just that "unconfident" in a big group of people. I'm not shy but I am not overly confident either! In a big group setting, I almost become like a wallflower.

6. I can't seem to finish this because I keep watching TV. So there are times it takes me forever to do something b/c the idiot box keeps distracting me.

7. I don't like to have "new" email messages in my inbox. I don't necessarily read the messages, but I have to mark them as read. It's really annoying that I do that because sometimes I overlook things because I think I've read them when in fact I haven't!

Cathy - I did it! Now, who can I tag?

DeeDee
Patty
Kim
Lisa
Mary
Sallie


Ok, that's 6 and I don't know if any of them will do it!

Thank you for thinking of me and including me, Cathy!


For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Internet Cafe Devotion: Romans 8:28

Cafe Chat


And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28

"What is one thing that happened in your life that initially may have been a bad or painful situation that you saw God work together for good? Please give details…"

Sometimes, when you're going through a situation, you just can't see what could possibly be good about it - at all! Much less, you don't see what can be used for God's glory, especially if you aren't in relationship with Him.

I mean, who really looks at a divorce and thinks "This is for God's glory"? Or, can you really look at a time in your life when you were so far away from even wanting to acknowledge God really loves you that you wanted to even think about the remote possibility of what was going on was for God's glory? What about the death of a loved one? But! Wait! There's is GLORY in EVERYTHING HE DOES!!!!!!!!!! Oh my goodness is there glory! GLORY!

I have such a testimony for God's glory. Have you been through something really bad? So have I! You know what God does? He has me use that experience to relate to you and show you what He can do. If all that I've been through makes a difference for just one person (although, I really wish it would be more, but that's just me, we know how heaven rejoices when even 1 sheep is found) to turn from a life without Christ to a life WITH HIM, holy SMOKES! I'm there!!

I know I'm not really saying anything about a specific time that God has used for His glory. Maybe it's because I can now see what He uses in my life (past and current) to relate to other folks and how He's able to show His greatness and His glory through those situations. I fall short all the time but His mercies and His grace are new every morning!!! Yippee!!!

Thank you, Lord, for loving me even when I didn't love myself. Thank you for continually knocking on my heart and softening me up to the point where I finally let you in. I thank you too for taking away the shame I felt over my past and my being able to use it to glorify You! Thank you for the wonderful people you have placed in my life that help me follow You and see You. You are a wonderfully gracious Father and I love you so much!



For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Thank you, Lord!

Things that make me happy and/or make me giddy, in absolutely no particular order!

Clean Sheets

Getting in bed with clean sheets after a shower

Hearing my kids say I love you!

Hearing my husband say I love you!

Hugs

My puppy curling up next to me

Email from friends!

Comments on a blog ;)!

Clean house (I don't get this one very often.)

Wednesday night Bible study group

Starbucks

Enjoying going to work every day

Being appreciated

Giving encouragement to someone and knowing I've helped in some way (that's a God thing!).

Singing to a great worship song and thinking I sound GREAT!

Quirky sense of humor

New Cover Tune Grab Bag videos from MercyMe.

New features on blogspot.

Chocolate.

Winning a sweepstakes!

e-bay...sometimes...when I find what I want

God is so good - all the time! He's poured out His blessings on me. This week I got hired on as a permanent employee at the place I've been temping. I watched my daughter driving behind me (as I was driving). Both of the girls had a safe flight to see their dad for his 40th birthday surprise. Our church had a tailgating tent set up at one of the HS football teams and we were passing out free food, t-shirts and footballs! All for His Glory! My grandmother had outpatient surgery and is recovering well. God has given the South a bit of fall weather! It feels MARVELOUS!

I have some new bloggy friends! I'm glad to have friends - new and newer ;). I hope you've been having a good week. *hugs*

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Hindsight

A couple of years ago, I took part in a challenge when I blogged at yahoo 360. My friend Mary at http://www.maryrsnyder.com/ just posted a blog about her younger self and it reminded me of this post from Sept. 2006:


Dear Cathy:
I know you don't like to listen to grown ups and what they have to offer, but I can only hope as I am you as a grown up, that you will listen to me. You're 14 right now and you have your whole world ahead of you. I know what life is going to be like when you're 38 and honey there are just some things you need to not do!
Keep God first. You're active in youth at Church right now. Don't lose it. You keep God first right now, and most of the things we're going to go through later on wouldn't have happened.
QUIT SMOKING. Ugh, you don't really smoke much right now and it won't be so hard. In a few more years, you'll be glad you did. Believe me when I tell you that it's really hard to quit when you've been doing it for so long.
Keep on saying no to drugs. You know it's the one thing I said actually said no to and I'm so glad I did. We'll drink some and sometimes to extremes, but drinking is never a problem for us.
When you start losing weight this year, work on keeping it off. Keep on exercising and make it part of your every day life.
On your 15th birthday, don't go to the golf course. Save your virginity for someone special.
That guy at Aladdin's Castle that you think is wonderful. He's going to be your first husband. I'm not sure if you should go down that path or not. As long as you'll wind up where I am right now, you shouldn't. But, I don't think it works that way. I'm sorry to say that when you're walking down the aisle, 3 days before your 19th birthday, you're going to regret it and wish you weren't. We don't stay married toooooooo long. Hey, on the bright side, we went to school and learned how to type. This will be important. Maybe you should take typing in high school and not worry about failing or passing the class. Just do it!
In your junior year of high school, there will be a Christmas party for the Color Guard at the teacher's house. GO TO THE PARTY. Do not, and I stress, DO NOT go with Mireille to see that guy. That guy is a jerk. Because of the events of that night, you will battle with many demons for many years. Eventually, you will ask God to forgive you, and He will (see, keep God first and this wouldn't even be part of the hindsight), but it's a long and hard battle that you aren't going to share with many folks. You'll regret the events of that night forever.
You're going to become guys' best friend. They will come to you to talk about their girlfriends. Just deal with it. It's not that you aren't good enough for any of them. It's that you're a good listener and you seem to know what to say. This won't really change through the years. Many times, you'll have more male friends than female friends.
When you and Tim break up, you're going to meet a guy named David. Now, listen very carefully, the two of you will get married. It's not a bad marriage, although ya'll don't communicate well. But, you will get divorced. The divorce will be painful. You will do everything you can to make it work but it's just not going to happen. But, here is why you have to marry this guy. You have two beautiful daughters who are your heart and soul. Oh, I just can't tell you how wonderful these girls are. They are so talented in many ways and they just bring joy to you. Oh yeah, sometimes you're going to feel like you're at your wits' end, but then one of them will do something so incredibly sweet, and it will melt you all over.
During this marriage, you will discover the Internet and chat rooms. Listen to me right now...any man you meet who knows you're married and still tries to sweet talk you isn't worth the time it takes to type hello. (If you keep God in that number 1 position, this will be moot.) If you would talk to your husband about these needs you have, you wouldn't have talked to this guy in the first place. That makes us examine the next point..
Learn to communicate your needs and emotions. Be able to tell people no and not feel like they are taking advantage of you, because you know what? THEY ARE! But, dear sweet young Cathy, you are allowing them to do so. Close that open wall up and build a beautiful door which only you can open. Oh you can be such a sucker...don't be a sucker Cathy.
You deserve better than having an affair with a married man. You are better than that. I know at 14 you think I'm insane even bringing this up, but trust me, it will become a huge issue. You deserve someone who will love you no matter where you are. You deserve someone who will hold your hand, call you and not hide the conversation, who will tell folks "Can I call you back? Cathy's on the phone." Cathy you are a wonderful person. All the good things you think you deserve? You do deserve them. (Hey look, again, if you keep God in that #1 position, this won't happen either.)
Sex. I've brought this up a lot, huh? You know what, it's not what's missing from you life. It's not what is going to make you happy. Oh yeah, it feels great, but it feels even better with the right person.
You know that little voice that you hear but then ignore? Learn to just listen to it. I can't tell you how many times that little voice is right. You're going to ignore her and be sorry. And you're going to hear her taunting you saying, "I TOLD YOU SO!!!!!!!"
Here's one thing I don't know if I should tell you or not. Your brother...you aren't going to believe this one....next year when he graduates from High School, the two of you are going to become best friends. I know it's shocking!!! He's still going to act like he's going to hit you and then really do it. For some reason, that never changes. Cherish him. Figure out how to save some of those long and crazy voice mail messages he leaves, because he won't be around to leave them when you're older. Oh Cathy you're going to miss him so much. Your whole world will change on March 28, 2002. It's going to be hard and at first you just won't believe you're going to make it. Just keep on taking it one day at a time. Actually at first, it's one breath at a time. You'll make it through. You have to because shortly after this your mom is going to get really sick. She has to have you be strong for her. You make it through that too. See, you're amazing really at all you can do. You don't think you are sometimes, but you are.
At some point in 2004, when you least expect it, you're going to fall in love with this man named James. DON'T RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!! You'll spend months trying to run from him because of all your past mistakes. But don't do it. He's not going to let you get away. And YOU DESERVE HIM!!! This man is everything you have ever wanted in a husband and soul mate. Neither of you think anything will ever come out of your relationship because you're just friends, but it will. I can't tell you how much you are going to love him. I can't even find the right words to express myself in today's world about him. How can I tell you?? I asked him one day how he put up with me and all my quirks (we have quite a few) and he said he didn't put up with me. He just loved me. Cathy, he's wonderful. He makes the other two marriages and all the heartbreaks in between worth it because he is the one you will go on with for the rest of your life.
You're going to have a bumpy road, Cathy, but if you'll keep this advice with you, you will be ok. All those little bumps and valleys and peaks make you who you are today. Keep seeing the beauty in everything and in everyone. Keep your wonderful sense of humor. Life is pretty funny, even when we don't think it is. You have a way of making people smile when they didn't think they could. You deserve all the good that happens in your life.
Above all, dear Cathy, keep God #1 in your life. I promise if you do this, many of the things I have told you about won't even be an issue. Even if you falter and slide away, He is going to open His arms for you to come running back into. Yippee!! He forgives you so much easier than you will forgive yourself. Good thing is that He is there to help you on your journeys.
Life is beautiful, Cathy, experience it! I love you, don't ever ever forget that!!
Cathy






For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Saturday...

I started out the day just knowing I was going to blog. I had a blog in mind; all I had to do was just write it. I've been on the computer 3/4 of today ~ I had the time. But, the blog I'm writing now is not the one I had in mind. It's been a weird day for me. Has it been for you too?

For some reason, it hit me today that I'm just lonely. And finally vocalizing that just made me really sad. Then, you gotta know what happened next...Oh, yes, pity and self-doubt. I'm sure I make a great target for satan. I just give him so much material to use.

Let's dig into the married/lonely part for a few. So, I'm married woman. I'm on my third marriage...for some reason, each husband has had to travel extensively for job/career. Is it me?? The schedule James is having to keep right now is making communication very difficult. Not only is finding time difficult, but I'm finding myself so darn insecure about us too. Being insecure makes me question everything and I can't stand that! UGH! When did I turn into THAT person? So I am NOT going to be that person!

How do I not be her, though? Well, most importantly I remember that God makes everything wonderful and He made me...that makes me wonderful. He knows the plans He's made for me. And as basic as this promise is - it's the best one I remembered - Jesus loves me! Yes, even me. Such a lowly and unworthy sinner who only by the perfect love of Jesus taking my sin on the cross - in His death and resurrection - am I able to claim the promises of my God as my own. All the seeds He keeps tossing at me, I keep watering with my tears. But, for HIS glory, and HIS glory alone, will those seeds flourish into something beautiful and fruitful.

In all that I do, I will do for my Lord - whether it's keeping a calm attitude when my almost 16 yo daughter is driving or driving in traffic; not having "what if" thoughts when I don't hear from James; using my time wisely at home and at work; trying to keep a house that is pleasing to God and won't embarrass me or anyone else; leading a bible study group; attending church and church activities; with all that I am and all that I have - I want to be pleasing to the Lord.

Colossians 3:17 says: "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." YES!

Earlier today when I was giving satan all sorts of ammunition to use, I should have listened to Voice of Truth from the Casting Crowns. It usually tears me up (in a positive way) and it would've been a good time tearing up today.

What I don't understand is why all these truths won't stick in my head and hide in my heart? Why does seem I have to relearn this every day?? His mercies are new every morning - does my mind think it has to renew every morning too?

Ok well the day didn't stay blecky. I had a Mommy / Kristen time. We went to eat at Moe's (WELCOME TO MOEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!), walked around Hobby Lobby and had alot of fun taking pictures with the props (errrr...inventory), and had a root beer float to support Juvenile Diabetes (Hope Floats it was called at Fresh Market).

I saw this hilariously funny video on Mercy Me's website (thank you Boomama!), and I can't help but think "Do they know they are famous?" Seriously, I didn't think famous folks acted as silly as they do on that video and you know what? I LOVE it! It helps me remember that although they are famous, they are still just peeps, just like I'm a peep. We're all God's peeps! I can't figure out how to get the video embedded in here - the codes just didn't want to work for me but I do have a link to their blog in my blog list thingy over to the right.

So that's been my day in a small nutshell. I'm glad I don't have a lot of days like today *shew*.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

What a good week!

We had a big week last week! I started my new temp to hopefully perm job and little bit got her braces off! We were all pretty excited about the job AND the lack of braces.

I've enjoyed my long weekend. I was pooped after working all last week! I felt bad complaining to James because he was out in the field, a/k/a not having air conditioning or shade for 12 - 16 hours a day *yuck*. I couldn't help it though. Lol

I'm glad gustav was knocked to a cat 2 and didn't cause the damage as was anticipated *go GOD*!!

I hope you're having a good week. It's time for me to go night night.

Pretend I have a creative title ~

I wish I had a creative title, but creativity isn't one of my gifts or talents, so let's pretend it's creative.

I don't even know where to begin a post about the weekend. The conference was phenomenal. Wait, I don't want to start there. I want to start with the peeps God put in my path this weekend. On my flight were some ladies (Siestas!) from Birmingham. It was nice to have someone to walk and talk with during our layover. (We also shared the flights back!) We rode the shuttle to our respective hotels and met a couple of other ladies too who were going to the conference. One of them didn't blog, but she had met Beth Moore when Beth stayed in her FL house! How cool!

On Saturday, a couple of Siestas were in the hotel lobby and we caught a taxi to the Dome together. After the Fiesta, we ran into each other and they invited me to go eat some really good Mexican food with them! Thank you, Deb & Heather, for inviting me and listening to me babble. (I pretty much chattered the whole time we were together - the downside to my being by myself for too long.)

There were two sweet women who I sat with on Friday and Saturday, D'Ann and Holly. We didn't have a whole lot of time to chat, but I could just tell they were nothing short of precious. They made sure I was loved on during the conference! Thank you, ladies, for making sure I had someone to sit with and for showing me love!

We were split into groups for group pictures with Beth, Amanda & Melissa. Can I just tell you that they are all so tiny??? Size 0 maybe? I got to hug Beth & Amanda! I was telling my daughter that they knew my name, and she said "Were you wearing a name tag?" *sigh* I had already come to that conclusion, but I was trying to think they knew my name because of my witty and snazzy comments on the blogs. Oh darn, who am I kidding? I'm going to keep on thinking it's because of my wit!

The Siesta fiesta was fun. It was neat to put some real faces to some of the blog names AND I just loved seeing Amanda & Melissa interact with each other and their momma! After hearing so much about them through the various studies I have done, it was just neat to see it first hand. I could so picture Melissa saying to her mom, "Are you going to boss me today?" tee hee hee

Beth said "peeps" during the conference and said Melissa told her she should never say that again! I loved it (the fact that she said peeps).

The conference was out of this world. When Travis started the worship music, I started crying. I was so overwhelmed with all the beautiful voices worshipping at the same time. We had a song that we sang a Capella and none of the praise team was singing, and I thought that the sound was so sweet that it must be the sound God hears when we sing His praises. Ummm ummm mmmm.

I didn't get to see a whole bunch of San Antonio AND I missed the PJ party! I was so tired when I got back to my room last night and I was sinusy feeling that I fell asleep! I think all the non-sleep of the last month and the past couple of days just caught up with me.

Oh, the topic of the conference was about inheritance and how I'm an heiress of God! Yahoo-Jah!

I have to get ready for my first day of work :-)! Mary, you're the only commenter (and probably reader), so I hope you've enjoyed a tiny recap. Oh, I forgot my darn camera!!

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Weekend in and around Savannah, GA

My husband is in the Army, and he's stationed in Louisville, KY. When we met and married, he was a recruiter with the AL National Guard, and he wasn't supposed to be leaving. However, as is life, this ideal work scenario didn't work out. Hubby deployed to Kuwait and then became part of the active Army. Since January 2, he's been stationed in Texas and Kentucky. Since he's been stationed in KY, he's gone to Wisconsin, Mississippi, and Georgia! He's done more traveling than staying in KY, which is one of the reasons we aren't living together. Anyway, he's currently at Ft. Stewart, which is outside of Savannah, GA for the next 3 months.

Because of work schedule, he isn't going to be able to come home very often, plus he doesn't his car which will make it hard for him to get home…I don't have a lot going on right now *cough* and I thought it would be a good time to take a road trip! Friday, after the girls got off to school and I dropped Maggie off at the vet for the weekend, I headed on to Savannah. From Birmingham to Macon, I had all sorts of things to look out and signs to read. However, from Macon to the Base, there was NOTHING to keep me amused. It seemed to take longer for that part of the trip than the 5 hours it had taken to get to Macon! I did have a book on tape (Teacher Man by Frank McCourt – very good!), which helped pass the time.

I had good timing because hubby got done with work about the time I was passing through the Base! I picked him up and we headed to his temporary home quarters. Oh me oh my…his quarter is a tiny hotel room with 2 beds and mold on the ceiling! One of the chairs had so many stains on it, neither of us would sit in it. He's going to be in there until November and there is a chance he'll have a roommate! Holy smokes!! I certainly hope that doesn't happen. I mean, I love the man with all that I have and I wouldn't want to share that space with him for 3 months!!!

We went to Savannah last night and got a nice hotel room in South Savannah. Oh the bed and pillows were heavenly and everything was so clean! There was even a coffee pot J. We went to downtown Savannah and took a horse carriage tour around town. I've always wanted to do that – it looks so romantic. (You aren't really expecting the smells of the horse and those aren't romantic.) We took a private tour at a public tour price *score*! We saw where Forrest Gump sat waiting to take the bus to Jenny's house; the house from the book Midnight in the Garden of Good & Evil; places Julia Roberts filmed "Something to Talk About". After the tour, we walked down to the waterfront and walked (and walked and walked and walked) around looking at all the shops and did some people watching. There's a City Market, so we walked down there too. Come to find out that on Saturday night it's more of a City Bar Scene. Oh we found Paula Deen's restaurant, but it was closed already.

I don't get out and do much physical activity (gotta work on that), so I wasn't quite ready for all of that walking. Luckily, I wore my "comfortable" flip flops...*cough* My dogs were barking loudly by the time we made it back to the hotel and the memory of the super hard bed from the night before was alive in my memory and my back. I was very happy that hubby remembered to pack the generic Advil®!

We enjoyed a little lunch and Starbuck's before I had to hit the road back to Birmingham. L I tried to get him to come with me, but you know his employer is a little funny about folks not showing up for work. They threaten soldiers with things like court, demotion and prison time if you don't show up! Can you imagine?

I had a nice time spending time with hubby. We really needed some alone time, without any interruptions or kids needing chauffeuring. It felt more like "old times" where things were comfortable and easy between us. Praise God for answered prayers. We have to keep on communicating, but this weekend was nice start. I don't know when we'll be able to do this again because the troops they are going to be training will be in GA soon, and he won't get much off time. Also, there's this whole need for me to be employed and not having free time. We're hoping he won't be working without time off, but we just don't know yet.

I didn't get back in time to get my Maggie from the vet, and my other dog (who is older and doesn't tear up things so he can be left unattended) was looking forward to her coming back. He was so excited to see me drive up and walk up the stairs, but he seemed quite disappointed that Maggie wasn't with me.

I'm looking really forward to Friday, when I'm in San Antonio and I get to meet fellow Siestas! Yahoooooooo-JAH!!! I have lofty plans for the week (like working out and cleaning) OH and fall bible study starts on Wednesday! (I'll have to see who has signed up and get the workbook so I'll know what I'm supposed to do.)

Happy BIRTHday to me!

Today is my second birthday! It was two years ago today that I surrendered my life to Christ! Woo hoo!!!

I'm sure some folks thought my becoming born-again was just a phase, but I'm really glad I proved them (and myself) WRONG!

If people who aren't believers or who are fence riders (like I used to be) could understand how great it feels to be a Christian and have a relationship with Christ (even if it's still growing), they would never want to not be in relationship with Him.

Thank you, Lord, for giving me yet another chance. I'm glad this one has stuck.

I'm believing God!


For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11

Ramblings

Monday night was the first small group leader meeting of the "new" class year. It's about the only time we have to come together and try to get to know each other, even in a small way. Oh, we see each other often, but it's passing in the hall on our way to our rooms.

We start the meeting with prayer and then song (soooo glad the Lord says "make a joyful noise"). I got excited because I saw that "Revelation Song" was cued up. It's my new favorite song after I heard it at the Beth Moore simulcast a couple of weeks ago. It was sang at church last Sunday and then *boom* there it was again. However, that wasn't the song we were singing. But, I was still excited to see it. (We sang Hosanna, in case you were wondering.)

We went through stuff and then Pastor Paul took over the meeting. In October, we'll be starting a new study on prayer by Jim Cymbala, and he (Pastor Paul, not Jim Cymbala) was talking to us about prayer. He lead us in a prayer time that was very unique to me. First, we separated into two groups: men/women. We quieted ourselves and asked God to speak to us and lay on our hearts what the person to our right needed prayer about. While we were still quieted, we were to pray for the needs God laid on our hearts for our neighbor. When the prayer time was over, we were then to share with the person what God laid on our hearts.

I shared with my right hand friend that God wanted her to know to let go of her son, who is going to college next week, and to let her know that He will finish the work He has started in her son. The lady to my left shared that she prayed for me to keep what I'm doing with my family, amidst all the struggles; I was doing what He wanted me to do! Now, my right hand friend is also my mentor and my friend, so it would be easy to rationalize how I knew what to pray for her. But, the lady to my left and I know each other, but I can't rationalize her knowing about my struggles other than it being a God thing! Most of the women were weeping a wee bit and so were some of the men! I thought this was the coolest things, ever. Maybe if I stilled myself more before God, I would hear Him speak.

Does anyone else just crack up at the new Swiffer commercials where the mop, broom or duster is trying to woo back the female who stopped using them? If I'm finding amusement from commercials, am I spending way too much time watching TV? (Oh, I can answer that. YES!) Oh, I'm cracking up just thinking about the broom peeking out from behind a tree and "Baby Come Back" playing. tee hee hee hee

Looking for a job is going really really slow. I can't even keep up with the number of applications I have put in and nothing. I don't think craigslist is the best place for me to look...unless, of course, I want to review and input ads. I would gladly do that; if it didn't cost money to start!

I can't believe the Siesta Fiesta is NEXT WEEK!!!!!!! I'm really excited to meet my fellow siestas and of course mama siesta!!!!!!!! I'm looking forward to a lot of laughter and giggles. I so need giggles and laughter.

I've been enjoying tooling around the various blogs that I have recently found. How have I not seen these incredible blogs before? So many talented and FUNNY and godly women out there. Yahoo-Jah!

Well, another episode of Law & Order is on (the original), so I guess I'll go watch it. Heaven knows I haven't watched enough TV today *cough*.

Thanks for reading the ramblings ;).



For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer. 29:11